National Single Parents Day : March 21, 2021

Author: Anonymous

This month, we celebrated National Single Parents Day, which acknowledges over 55 million parents in the US alone. In fact, according to the Pew Research Center, FACT TANK, the US has the world’s highest rate of children living in single-parent households. So… Do we get a prize for that or something? Oh, that’s right, we get a day. Okay… cool.

Now, you may not have ever heard about this day or realized it was happening just last week. As I look up at my wall calendar, which lists all sorts of holidays and observed days from around the world, I see absolutely nothing about it. I don’t recall seeing anything on social media or on the news. I don’t recall hearing “Happy Single Parents Day” from anyone or receiving a little card with a sad little plant.

Well, so it goes… This is par for the course for many single parents. We do so much to keep things running and keep our kids fed, happy, clean, and unaware of how much work it all is —  and we rarely receive any sort of acknowledgement. But, we’re not bitter. We do it because we love our kids, and well… because we have to — even when we’re too tired, overly hungry, having a really bad day, or just really wanting to tune out and binge watch something not animated and without interruptions. We do it the best we can. We (often) do it with a smile. We do it.  (And then, we often collapse in a heap.) 

So, as a single parent myself, I absolutely celebrate, every day, the close bond I have with my daughter — and I (really) wouldn’t have it any other way. Sure, it was hard when she was younger. For example, I didn’t get to shower at all for the first week (or so) after she was born, because there was no one to hold her while I jumped in. There was no one there to take her for 5 minutes when I felt like I couldn’t keep my eyes open for even 30 seconds more. Further, trying to cover child care payments with no child support (at all), was very, very stressful (to say the least). 

It all worked out though and I never felt put upon. I may be amongst the very lucky ones though. I know plenty of people who deal with the regular heartbreak of arguing with their co-parent about how to raise their kid(s), splitting the time they have with their child between co-parents, and all of the other challenging things that come with being a single/co- parent. Others mourn the loss of their spouse on top of taking on the challenge of raising their children on their own.

So, whatever your situation… if you’re also a single parent (whether divorced, widowed, never married, partnered, etc.), we got our day — that kind of day where everyone tells you to “get a babysitter and take yourself out!” For me personally, I never had the extra money for a babysitter, didn’t want one, and the celebration days were the days that I wanted to take out my girl and enjoy every moment with her.* 

If you’re not a single parent, thanks for reading… I’ve always appreciated it when people took the time to get to know what it’s like for me — and offered to help even! Want to know a little bit more about single parents? Here are 5 Fun Facts from National Today: 

1. Nearly a quarter of the children in America are born to a single mother.
2. One survey found that the vast majority of single parents were gainfully employed, on top of raising a child — this includes 8 out of 10 single mothers and 9 out of 10 single fathers.
3. The two groups with the largest increase in single parentage are white and Hispanic families.
4. Nearly ⅓ of all single-parent families live in poverty and receive some kind of government financial assistance.
5. The average age for a single parent is 39 years old.

So, Happy (belated) National Single Parents Day! As far as I’m concerned though, every day is Single Parents Day!

*Something I think that many married parents don’t realize is that for a lot of single parents who share custody, they don’t feel like they get nearly enough time with their kids — and the time they do have is often filled with homework, friends, chores, school, and sleeping. So, when you’re offering to help, sometimes offering to take on a chore or fund a parent-child outing is even better than offering to babysit! Any offer, though, is greatly appreciated (I can tell you first hand.) It does take a village to raise a child — no matter how capable, determined, and resourceful we may be.

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