According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, the word “amicable” means to be “characterized by friendly goodwill” or “peaceable”.
The term “amicable divorce” may seem like an oxymoron. When couples are at the point of deciding that divorce is their best option, they are unlikely to be feeling a lot of friendly goodwill toward each other. But if you can put your emotions aside and think of it as negotiating a treaty with tact and diplomacy, it might be easier to imagine. It is advantageous to everyone if the divorce settlement can be achieved in a polite and peaceful way.
It does not mean that you have to give in on issues important to you just to keep things friendly. It means working things out in a cooperative and fair manner so that you end up with an agreement that works for everyone. You avoid the costly, antagonistic, and painful litigation process, and you keep your dignity and integrity.
The reason you are divorcing is to end a marriage that was in conflict. Do you really want to prolong the conflict and pain by taking your spouse to court? An amicable divorce process allows you to plan for your future with mutually agreed upon decisions and get on with your life.
Some people want to use the divorce process as an instrument to hurt the other or to exact revenge. The problem with this is that the other side will respond in the same manner, leading to further escalation. Will this get you what you want?
Others may feel that going through a friendly divorce process will cause them to lose their position of strength in negotiations. They think having an aggressive divorce lawyer fighting for their interests only will get them a better settlement. But again, this will likely lead to an equally aggressive response from the other side. Who is really going to win in this scenario?
Divorce with Dignity is a network of divorce professionals committed to helping people achieve an amicable divorce with the least distress possible. They provide divorce advice and support by helping you learn about your options for a peaceful divorce that will focus on what is best for you and your family, and avoid the negative, adversarial aspects that are part of a litigated divorce.
Achieving an amicable divorce may not be easy, but it is definitely worth the effort.
The author of this blog is not an attorney and the information contained in these blogs should not be considered legal advice. The information provided here is based on the experience of the author and some of her clients whose actual names are not mentioned. Do not hesitate to seek the advice of an attorney if you have any legal questions.
