When you think of spring cleaning, you likely think about the long-ignored chores at the bottom of your to-do list. However, there are many other forms of spring cleaning that can be just as useful, especially when it comes to re-assessing your relationships.
For example, spring cleaning is, above all, an act of rejuvenation. It’s a process through which you can shake off the dust from certain areas of your life, allowing you to start anew.
As a result, if you were thinking of indulging in some ‘spring cleaning’ this March, start by looking at your relationships with the people you surround yourself with.
If you are in the process of a divorce, you may think that this is the only relationship worthy of separating yourself from – but this, unfortunately, may not be the case. For example, it may also be time to move on from friendships that no longer serve you or your happiness.
Identify Toxic Relationships.
Toxic relationships, both platonic and romantic, are more damaging than they are fruitful. It does not matter how long somebody has been a part of your life or how many happy memories you share; if spending time with them hurts you, it’s time to cut the chord.
However, to make this possible, it’s essential that you’re able to identify the signs of toxic relationships, such as:
- You feel as though they do not listen to you.
- They seem intent on putting you down or making light of your emotions.
- They are jealous of your successes but happy to talk about failures or things going wrong.
- They make it hard for you to be yourself around them.
- They are controlling.
- Your relationship is defined by their terms and boundaries, with your own needs not being taken into consideration.
Once you have realized that the relationship is no longer serving you in the right way, it’s up to you how you proceed. You could talk with the other person to outline your feelings and concerns and see if something can be salvaged as a response.
However, you should put in certain boundaries to protect yourself. If they are unwilling to or do not make the changes, start investing your energy into other, more positive relationships.
Think about mutual friends you share with your Ex.
When you go through a divorce, it’s not only your relationship with your ex-spouse that changes – but also those whose lives you are mutually entwined with. For example, you may share many mutual friends.
This does not mean you have to stop seeing or spending time with these people, but you may need to reframe your relationship with them. For example, you may need to determine their loyalties, especially if you feel they’ll pass on the information you share with them to your ex.
However, it’s possible for mutual friends not to take anyone’s side – especially if you are participating in a peaceful divorce.
However, if certain relationships exist only through your partner, don’t feel you have to continue with them, especially if you do not have anything in common. It’s okay to let people be part of just a chapter or two of your life’s story.
Your Relationship With Yourself.
When spring-cleaning your relationships, you should also focus on sprucing up your relationship with yourself. In many cases, this can be instrumental to your healing during a divorce. After all, trying to keep a relationship together can be exhausting and often means you disregard your own feelings and emotions in favor of the other person.
As such, use this as an opportunity to reconnect with yourself. Indulge in your hobbies, practice self-care, and spend some time alone.
Going through a Divorce? We’re here to help.
If you’re going through a divorce or are about to file paperwork for the first time, we’re here to help. By letting the experts guide you through this process, you’ll have more time to focus on spring-cleaning other areas of your life, such as your relationships. This will give you the peace you need to move forward with your head held high.
Get in touch today with a Provider to find out more.
