Releasing Negative Emotions Of Divorce

In our previous blog post, we shared some insights from one of our referral associates, Keiko Hsu, on finding emotional support during divorce. Keiko is the founder of Wings for Women (www.wingsforwomen.net), an organization that focuses on coaching, mentoring, and inspiring women after a “life-shaking transition such as divorce”. As part of our divorce planning and facilitation service, we at Divorce With Dignity often refer clients to other professionals and services they may need to put their lives back together during and after the divorce.

We asked Keiko what advice she would give to people going through divorce about releasing the negative emotions of divorce, and about how to prepare themselves for a better life after divorce. She talked about how important it is to forgive yourself and forgive your soon-to-be-ex. “Forgiveness does not mean that you condone their behavior – it’s releasing their hold on you to free yourself from past resentments so you can move on.”

So, how can people in the midst of the emotional turmoil associated with divorce get themselves into a mindset of forgiveness, and how can they release all the negative emotional energy to make way for the positive? Keiko has the following suggestions –

7 Ways to Release Negative Emotional Energy

1. Journaling – Lets you express what needs to be expressed. Good for venting and releasing that energy. Keeping a journal of what you’re going through can also help you to see the progress you’ve made. If you have a lot to say to your soon-to-be-ex but don’t want to say it to his/her face, try writing it in a letter, seal it in an envelope, and then burn it. Going through this ritual is a way to unload the burden from your heart and release that energy into the universe.
2. Meditation – A way to connect to your inner spirit and your higher self. Even just 10 minutes a day, or several times a week will have a great effect. Give yourself that quiet time to find inner calm and peace.
3. Gratitude – No matter what’s going on in your divorce, there’s bound to be some good things going on in your life. Focus on those, and cultivate an “attitude of gratitude” which is a high vibration of energy that will make you feel good and keep the negative emotions from hijacking your mind.
4. Sleep – Getting enough sleep will enable your body and your brain to recharge and energize.
5. Exercise  – Move your body! It will get your blood pumping and make you feel better! I highly recommend taking a Zumba class, which is vigorous exercise done to high energy, joyful music.
6. Hydration – Drink plenty of water. It’s amazing what staying hydrated does to improve your brain and body function; it’s like washing away your toxic emotions.
7. Nutrition – Be careful what you eat. Some foods will make you feel more depressed. Avoid gluten (as in wheat products) which interferes with the body’s natural ability to generate seratonin (a “feel good” chemical). Avoid sugar because although it might make you feel good temporarily, you will crash hard soon after.

Keiko also advises that in order to create the new life you want after divorce, you need to discover your your passions – the things that will really “make your heart sing”. Getting clarity on this will help you to find your path to your goals.  To help you get started, you can download her free “Passions Discovery Guide” on her website, www.wingsforwomen.net.

Let Divorce With Dignity help you through the divorce process in a holistic way, addressing the various aspects of your life that are affected by divorce. To learn more about how we can help, contact your local Divorce With Dignity affiliate at www.findaprovider.dwdignity.com. If you are going to divorce, do it with dignity and find your wings!