First of all, I know you hate your spouse right now or you wouldn’t be thinking divorce. Okay, maybe hate is a little strong for many of us, but one of you really wants to move on and you have no choice but to go through a divorce. So why shouldn’t you hire the meanest, toughest attorney you can find and go for EVERYTHING?
The reasons are many, but to begin with—you’re not going to get EVERYTHING—no matter what they’ve done! You’re going to get whatever your attorney works out with the other attorney according to the rules of your state. I’ve been there. I tried it; I lost—not only once; I lost twice. But it only took two losses and a ton of legal fees for me to figure out that maybe I should just talk to my Ex—I know I really couldn’t stand you, Ex, but what did I to lose? I’d already spent everything I had fighting you in court and lost; so either I walked away like a nice person and worked two or three jobs to send our children to a decent school, or I could talk it out with you and see if you wanted your children to go to one of the worst schools around and probably end up in the criminal justice system.
Guess what? He agreed, and off our children went to PRIVATE school which we both paid for equally, and I only had to work my one job once I finished paying off my legal fees for losing twice.
Message of the Day: You can talk to your spouse; no matter what your attorney says! Why do you think your attorney doesn’t want you to talk? You might settle; then they get less. They want to settle for you and have you pay them to do that. That really only works if you’re afraid of your spouse, or your spouse is not mentally able to have a reasonable conversation with you—yes, I know, you don’t think they’re capable of that, but do you want to spend $20,000 to find out? Of course, if you have a really nice attorney who talks really nice to both of you, and you need this third party to help you talk and make sense, go for it.
The author of this blog is not an attorney or a therapist and the information contained in these blogs should not be considered legal or medical advice. The information provided here is based on the experience of the author and some of her clients whose actual names are not mentioned. Do not hesitate to seek the advice of an attorney if you have any legal questions, and please see a therapist to help you with your transition.
