Are you going through divorce mediation and are worried about the process being negative and acrimonious?
What you might not realize is that it doesn’t have to be either of those things. You and your soon-to-be-ex-spouse have the power to make this process smooth and free of drama. Read on to learn how to make divorce mediation as emotionally neutral as possible.
Agree on ground rules
Divorce mediation works very well from the outset for some people because they went into the process with ground rules in effect.
Take the example of Kristin and Stefan. The couple divorced after five years of marriage. When they went through divorce mediation, they wrote a mission statement in which they agreed to work respectfully as partners to maintain a loving and stable environment for their young son.
Leave anger out of it
The goal of divorce mediation is not to make the other party pay for the wrongs you believe he or she has committed against you. Rather, the aim is to settle the issues at stake in an emotionally neutral manner.
When you go in with a great deal of anger, divorce mediation is doomed from the start. It’s difficult to abandon your hurt. However, in order to make divorce mediation successful, you’ll need to do just that.
Put your family’s interests first
If you have children, divorce can be even more stressful. Having kids means you have to settle issues of custody, visitation and child support.
Discussions about those three topics can quickly become heated. An important factor in making divorce mediation successful (as well as drama-free) is agreeing at the beginning to put the children’s interests first.
Before you get ready to argue about a particular point, ask yourself this: Is this within the best interest of my child/children? Will it lead to a better, healthier relationship between us? Am I going to fight about this issue because this is something that I want, or is it going to be what’s best for them?
Is it right for you?
Mediation is not for everyone. But everyone should at least consider it.
The success stories speak for themselves. Countless couples went into mediation with nothing but vitriol and spite, and left with a solid agreement that empowered them to move on to the next phase of their lives.
So, if you’re facing a divorce and expecting a genuine battle, you may want to talk to a divorce lawyer about mediation. It may save you the high-stress and high-drama that goes with settling in court.
Author Bio:
Fine & Associates Professional Corporation is a well-respected Toronto law firm that prides itself on providing quality, personal service at reasonable rates. The firm’s lawyers practice divorce and family law exclusively, and are experienced in all types of cases, including but not limited to child support, child custody, and divorce mediation.
The author of this blog is not an attorney and the information contained in these blogs should not be considered legal advice. The information provided here is based on the experience of the author and some of her clients whose actual names are not mentioned. Do not hesitate to seek the advice of an attorney if you have any legal questions.
