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Divorced Parents: Minimizing Conflicts In Shared Custody

Jun 14, 2012 | Emotional Effects of Divorce

Divorce is hard enough – but then divorced parents often have to contend with shared custody conflicts. These conflicts can arise from miscommunications, misunderstandings, or just forgetfulness about aspects of the agreement. How can divorced parents minimize these conflicts and make life easier on themselves and their children?

One tool that can help is an Internet-based program called ShareKids specifically designed to help manage joint child custody and co-parenting. Serving families throughout the United States and beyond, it facilitates communication and planning for the welfare of the children.

Information in the centralized data repository is kept secure by a comprehensive permissions system, which allows sensitive data to be marked as “private” (viewable only by the creator) or “shared” (accessible by other members on the account). That way, selected information can be shared with relatives, counselors, teachers, coaches, and guardian ad-litems.

ShareKids provides an infrastructure for managing such information as –

  • Mail messaging and correspondence
  • Appointments
  • Events and activity scheduling
  • Color-coded shared custody, visitation, and vacation schedules
  • School schedules
  • Homework assignments
  • Financial accounting for shared expenses and child or spousal support
  • Medical insurance information
  • Medication schedules and prescription tracking
  • Rules regarding court orders and other agreements
  • Important documents, such as copies of birth certificates, immunization shot records, etc.
  • Personal contacts/address book
  • Personal diary/incident logbook
  • Photo albums and photo galleries
  • And much more…

Plus, new features are added regularly in response to client requests. Registration is free, and once registered, the client will be asked to define the co-parent, the children, and the shared schedule calendar. Parents pay a nominal fee per month (currently $15) and discounts are given if prepaid for a full year. There is no additional charge for guests who are added to the account. Parents who are truly strapped financially can contact ShareKids who will work out some arrangement. Go to their site to learn more about ShareKids.

Managing the many aspects of shared custody and co-parenting will help to minimize stress and conflicts – for the parents and the children. Having all the important information organized in one place, and having the ability to share that information between the spouses as well as with selected others in a secure environment, promotes good communication and peace.

At Divorce With Dignity, we are all about helping you getting through your divorce with peace and dignity, and helping you find the tools to maintain that peace and dignity after the divorce as well. In addition to guiding you through the divorce process and filing the divorce papers for you, part of our service is to provide you with as many referrals as you need to address the issues in your unique situation. Besides tools for co-parenting, such as ShareKids, we can also refer clients to services such as mediators, divorce/life coaches, therapists, financial counselors, movers, and more. To find a provider near you, please visit us at findaprovider.dwdignity.com.

The author of this blog is not an attorney and the information contained in these blogs should not be considered legal advice. The information provided here is based on the experience of the author and some of her clients whose actual names are not mentioned. Do not hesitate to seek the advice of an attorney if you have any legal questions

Cindy Elwell
Founder, Divorce With Dignity

I believe that we are much better off making our own decisions about our private lives, instead of leaving it in the hands of the legal system.

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