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Common Reasons For Divorce

Sep 30, 2015 | Amicable Divorce and Conflict Resolution

The reasons for divorce can vary from couple to couple. Sometimes it’s as simple as realizing that you just can’t live together comfortably; other times it’s something much more serious such as once spouse cheating on the other. Whatever the case, you’ll need to be clear about why you are taking this very serious and very final step in order to obtain a legal divorce.

The grounds for divorce are generally legislated by each individual state and the rules can differ from one state to another. Generally speaking, you have two options for divorce: fault and no fault. In a no fault divorce, both parties agree to dissolve the marriage without specifying fault on either side.

In a fault divorce, a specific reason for the breakup of the marriage must be declared. Some of the more common reasons for divorce include adultery, cruelty, abandonment, mental illness and criminal conviction. In some states, drug abuse, impotency and religious reasons can also be considered legal grounds. Before filing for a fault divorce, you should be clear on exactly what the rules are in your home state.

Of course, there may be times when grounds for divorce aren’t quite so clear-cut. No matter how much they might love each other initially, individuals can sometimes simply grow apart emotionally. Not every person develops at the same pace and it can become frustrating for one partner to be dealing with someone who they feel isn’t meeting their emotional needs.

This is what makes divorce such a difficult road to travel and why it should be considered very carefully. If you can’t lay out clear reasons for divorce on a personal level, it may be impossible to do so from a legal standpoint, which could make the whole process that much messier. Having a good divorce attorney can help you to navigate through the legal minefield but you may still find yourself struggling emotionally.

From a legal standpoint, not only will you have to formally state your grounds for divorce, you will be required to provide proof of those grounds in order to obtain a divorce ruling. In the case of adultery or abuse that may not be too difficult to do, but in the more “gray” areas of emotional tension between partners, it can be a challenge.

Despite that challenge, however, many couples still opt for a fault divorce for several reasons. It can often be quicker as it results in an immediate ruling without a trial separation period, and if the reasons for divorce can be successfully proven, it can result in greater financial gain for the spouse who was wronged. However this type of divorce can take a terrible emotional toll on everyone involved, especially children.

Whatever your grounds for divorce, you should always consider every option available to you before taking this serious step. It’s never something that should be entered into lightly or as a heated emotional reaction. There are positive alternatives to explore. If you are experiencing difficulties in your marriage, try and take a step back, assess the situation as calmly as possible and then make the best choice for you and your family.

The author of this blog is not an attorney and the information contained in these blogs should not be considered legal advice. The information provided here is based on the experience of the author and some of her clients whose actual names are not mentioned. Do not hesitate to seek the advice of an attorney if you have any legal questions.

Cindy Elwell
Founder, Divorce With Dignity

I believe that we are much better off making our own decisions about our private lives, instead of leaving it in the hands of the legal system.

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