A happy marriage may mean different things to different couples, but once fractures begin to appear in a relationship, the need for separation becomes clear. This is due to the simple fact that healthy relationships require certain qualities or traits to ensure that every party is happy. Typically, these include principles such as trust, mutual respect, tenderness, and affection. Should you feel these factors are missing from your marriage, then it may be time to re-evaluate your partnership.
To begin with, you may want to ask yourself the following questions:
How does my spouse make me feel?
If you ask happy newlyweds these questions, you may receive responses such as ‘excited’ or perhaps even ‘giddy.’ However, while passion does calm a little as we settle into married life, these words should never be inherently negative. For example, if your partner makes you feel unhappy, disrespected, or uncertain, – this is a clear sign that you may be heading for divorce.
Do I think about life without my Significant Other?
When you are in a happy relationship, your future plans or dreams will likely involve your spouse. For example, you may think about the adventures you will embark on together when you retire. While, wanting a bit of time alone now and then is perfectly normal, if you find that you constantly wonder what your life would be like without your partner – it may be because this is the best option for you both. While this can seem daunting, it’s also important to remember that ending a romantic relationship does not necessarily mean that you will end the relationship altogether – it just means you have to redefine what you are to each other. For example, an amicable divorce process can help you transition smoothly from partners to co-parents.
Do we live separate lives?
As a relationship nears its end, you may find that you and your spouse live separate lives that only intersect whenever you are home or attending a family function. At this stage, your relationship is merely held together by a sense of obligation, as opposed to a desire for romance and intimacy. Many people choose to stay in this stage for a long time – and though it may appear to outsiders that everything is fine – this can cause a great deal of emotional stress and turmoil. As a result, if you find that you begin to have a life in which your partner does not play an important role, then once again, it’s time to have a conversation about how you want to move forward.
Are our feelings towards each other becoming hostile?
During the breakdown of a relationship, it’s all too easy for feelings of hostility to settle in. This is only natural, as it can be hard to see the reasons you fell in love with somebody when you are in the process of falling out of love. Usually, these feelings stem from the idea that somebody is to blame for the dissolution of the marriage. However, while this can seem to be true for some cases, such as infidelity, in others, there is nobody to blame – sometimes people change and grow apart. Nevertheless, while you may be aware that these feelings are illogical, it’s essential that you do not let things reach a stage wherein you are openly hostile to each other. Instead, ensure that you take the time to listen to each other’s feelings. Try to understand that there is nobody to blame – as this will help you move forward peacefully.
So, what happens if I decide to end my marriage?
As mentioned previously, ending a romantic relationship does not mean that you have to end the entire relationship. After all, you will likely want what is best for your ex-partner, and they should extend the same grace to you moving forward. Therefore, once you have decided to end your relationship, you should clarify that you want to make the divorce as amicable and peaceful as possible.
When you work with a DWD Provider, they can guide you and your spouse through every stage of the process to ensure the best possible outcome for each party. To achieve this, we work to reopen channels of communication between yourself and your spouse where they may have broken down. This mediation process enables you to hear and recognize each other’s perspectives in new ways and can help to heal wounds emotionally. This means that you will be in a much better place when it comes to making agreements on how you shall begin your separate lives – whether this amounts to splitting assets or sharing childcare duties.
The mediation and divorce process can be difficult – and we do not wish to downplay that in any way. However, we believe that by working together, we can make the process as peaceful and stress-free as possible for our clients. Therefore, if you are ready to make a change in your life – please do not hesitate to get in touch today.
